Abusive Relationship

You met a new guy. He's sweet, cute, smart, funny and he just wants to be with you... all the time. In fact, he already declaring his undying love for you even before your very first date. He is totally into you. He wants to know everything and everything about you. Even sends you cute and loving notes, SMSs, giving you gifts out of nowhere. Charming and romantic, huh? Who wouldn't be mesmerized?

After the 'beautiful' relationship blossomed, you noticed that he does some 'annoying' stuff like shoving you around, threatened to kill himself if you leave him, shows you his moody face just because you were friendly with some guy, throwing tantrums... You brush them off when he starts treating you nice again and telling you he can't live without you.Of course, what's a little jealousy if you're in love.

Being in an abusive relationship is nothing new. The abuser can be either a man or a woman. Here is perhaps, a few danger signs you should be on the lookout.

1. Declaring his/her undying love for you before even knowing each other.
2. His/her jealousy is over the roof, i.e. suspicious of any opposite sex, wanting you for
himself/herself all the time - this kind of jealousy is not love, it's a problem.
3. Control freak - tells you what to wear, what to do, what to say, picking your friends, job, keeps your money...
4. Threatens you if you tried to leave him/her or just when you refuse to do as instructed.
5. Violent towards you either physically (punching the walls, hitting you), mentally
(name-calling, insults) or sexually (insisting on unwanted sexual activity).

Bottom line is trust your instincts. If you feel that this is the kind of relationship you're living with, get out to safety. You can never expect to change a person. But don't try to break up the relationship abruptly. Talk to someone you can trust or call a counseling hot line. Plan ahead! You have a brighter future lying in front of you.